Author: Jess

I swore we’d be better this time around. We’d keep exploring, we’d keep traveling, we wouldn’t just STOP. And then somehow we did it anyway! So frustrated with myself. I had so many plans to do FUN things on MONDAY. We weren’t going to wait.Then life completely got in the way and now I don’t have plans to really go play with my kids until THURSDAY. How did I get here?

We had a family council tonight. Due to my frenzied desire to sell every possible item in our house, I’ve been a little…. distracted. Sam has not only been working, he’s been making amazing progress on our Airstream bedroom remodel. The kids have had fun playing with friends, but that is all it has been. PLAY. Without me. Without Sam. I take advantage of their distraction and list a few more items on our FB sale page, or organize one more thing in the garage. Sam is shut away in a room downstairs and we see him only when he emerges for lunch. Even the kids have sensed something is off.

The kids got in trouble for not helping tonight. They were relaxing on their beds reading (something we totally promoted in the Airstream) and were whiny about helping me clean up their room for the Appraiser who is coming in the morning (house needs to be “show ready”. As if we are anywhere close). After 4 minutes of arguing and listening to their whining, I gave up and told them to just go to bed. This led to tears (Rachel) and grumpy faces and more whining (Andrew). To their credit, they dutifully put their Pj’s on, brushed their teeth, turned off the lights and went to bed.

After I cooled down, I went in to go apologize and snuggle. Something was off and we needed to get to the bottom of it. After more tears (both kids) and the” world is ending” dialogue (Rachel) we called daddy and Cara in so we could all talk about it.

We determined we are missing a schedule. While the kids love to free play all day with their friends, they also need structure. We need some school. Some chores. Some WORK. We need more audio books, more family time. Rachel and Andrew want to spend time at places where they have great memories (Trafalga, the swimming pool, the library, Thanksgiving Point). We talked about school and chores in the morning, some designated reading time after lunch, and playing with friends after that. We also talked about everyone cuddling up on the floor in the evenings and listening to our audiobook stories (previously only allowed to listen while driving). We also talked about mom and dad needing help getting ready for the yard sale, and the kids could even earn money by helping with “big” chores.

I feel it was a good heart-to- heart. They went to bed smiling this time, and I feel better prepared to meet their needs. Moving is HARD. Selling all your stuff and moving into an Airstream is HARDER. A lot harder. They are so brave. I’m so proud of them.

We’ll see how things go over the next few days, but I will definitely make an effort to slow down (a little) and make sure we stay balanced.

Imagine running into your ex-boyfriend, while on a date with your husband. Awkward, right? That kind of happened to us, but with houses.  We had planned a later arrival date, but our Realtor called Wednesday evening (well, texted actually) that we had a great offer on the house but they wanted to know by Friday night. We knew we had to at least LOOK at the house before agreeing to sell, so we raced across Nevada with only a quick overnight stop at the Bonneville Raceway. We pulled up to the house in our Airstream Friday before noon and I probably felt more dread than anything else. I knew what was coming. After a quick photo, we parked alongside the house and the kids jumped out of the truck and ran inside.

I walked in a bit more slowly and then proceeded to cry. I couldn’t help it. So many good memories, so much happiness in the house. The kids ran gleefully from room to room excited about seeing everything they had left behind. Cara pulled out every. single. toy. in her room and ran up to me with a huge grin on her face to show me them one by one. They were so happy. Rachel had been asking for days when we’d get back as she could barely contain her excitement. Toys! Friends! The House!

After a quick lunch (more tears from me) the kids ran off to a friend’s house and played their little hearts out. It was Spring Break here, so friends were out of school and readily available. Happiness. Love. Excitement. Joy.

On the other hand, I wandered around in a bit of a daze all afternoon completely overwhelmed by all the stuff we own and need to get rid of. Wow. Why did we even by that? We don’t really NEED it do we? Such conflicted emotions. Do we NOT sell the house? Do we stay? Is this really where we want to raise our family?

It took us until about dinner time to have our hearts and  heads agree that we did really want to sell the house. This is not our path. Ours is a bit more…windy. As much as we have loved living here, love our neighbors, and are happy to have a short stay, we are ready to move on. The kids agree. As happy as they are, they are also excited about the next phase of our life and totally on board with selling everything and moving back in to the Airstream. *whew* The only one that is having a few issues is Cara. She told me the other morning that she wants to sell the Airstream and keep this house, but “move it to a campground”.  🙂

For Sam and I, we remembered why we bought and loved this house, but also why we “broke up” (the ex-boyfriend), and the more we are here the happier we are with the Airstream (aka husband) and our decision. Great metaphor, huh?

So now comes all the work. We’ve known it was coming, but I didn’t really expect to feel so incredibly overwhelmed. We are taking it one day at a time, one room at time. Planning a HUGE yard sale (in about a week and half!) and working on the improvements to the bedroom in the Airstream. Until then, we’ll play, dream, build, and try to get back on the road as soon as possible!